First!

Hello! We are being like all the cool kids and making a blog. I am foreseeing this being just a collection of all the random things we think of during the course of a day which we find hilarious. I imagine that this will actually turn out terribly because we’re probably way less funny than we think, and then everyone will boo and come to our houses with pitchforks and torches (because this blog is so terrible the Internet sent us back to the dark ages where we can’t put our awful posts on it) and kick us off the Internet, even though the Internet took care of that already. Yes, we will probably get kicked off the Internet by the Internet itself. In that case, then this was just for us, for posterity’s sake.

I’d like to just say right now that yes, I was inspired by many different sources and will probably somewhat emulate them. I’m not trying to copy anyone…I have limited means to express myself because I dance exactly like you would expect an awkward white nerd to dance, I sing in almost passable tenor despite being female, and even MS Paint poses an artistic challenge to me. My parents totally dicked me over when it came to passing on the fine art genes. So yeah…I just said “dicked over”. I would love to promise that my posts are going to be free of bad words and “that’s what she said” jokes and general innuendo. But then I would be lying and you couldn’t trust me and then you’d kick me off the Internet. So the above-mentioned things will definitely come up fairly often.

Case in point:
Stephani (who went to Ole Miss, or the University of Mississippi for the non-football inclined reader) was discussing how when her team was awesome and did that whole “dump sportsDrinkAde all over the coach” thing they kind of missed and hit him in the head with the keg (Ok, it’s probably a cooler in this case but it acts just like a keg) thing. Oh, I totally forgot a key part of this joke; the coach of Ole Miss is named Houston Nutt. Man, this joke would have sucked had I forgotten that. Anyway, so she told me that story and I replied: “So they totally busted a nut!” because I am about 12.

Actually, maybe that joked still sucked. Whatever, that’s how this blog is going to roll. (Whereas a log just rolls as any round object would) We’ll see.

~Melody